Internet Sensation

As everyone knows, I love my cats. I think they are some of the most beautiful things in this world – especially my Sasha. I am not alone. Anyone of you reading this that has been to my house – you always go right to him. Heck, even my father-in-law loves him. Despite his allergic reaction to cats, he always stops to pet him. His gorgeous eyes, soft fur and the way he craves to be petted screams attention whore. So now, the whole world will get to see him.

As a long time fan of the internet show Cute with Chris (CWC), I finally sent in a picture of Sasha. And damn, they posted it the very next day. For those wondering, I did try to get Marco on there, but they just did not go for it. I am hoping the whole world will come to adore my kitty. So far, the comments posted are not showing much love. I think it is because of his name and the photo title. Well in the United States, I have never heard of a man named Sasha – except the wife-beating actor from Step-By-Step. It is a common male name in Europe. But with international fame must come some scrutiny from a jealous public. Fortunately Sasha is strong enough to take it and not let it get to him.

So please visit CWC and if you like, comment about my kitty. However please be advised that if it is not kind in nature, I will have to torture you. I want him to be as famous as the skate boarding dog or the 44-pound kitty lost in New Jersey. And you think my cats are fat!

BTW, the kitty in my profile pic is Marco – so he has been on the Net for a while.

Fond Memories

What Were We Thinking??

Following a blog link a friend sent (so I could watch SNL mock Sen. Bobby Byrd, D-W.Va.), I came across a picture of a shark's tooth necklace. A seemingly unimportant item, it immediately flooded my mind with a high school memory.

This particular flashback involves my closest friend, Patti. And like any story I tell involving her, it is probably only really funny to us. What makes the memory even better for me is that if i even mention seeing a picture of shark's tooth, she will bring up this particular story, too.

One day after parking the car, we were walking down the hill to school. Typically, we cut through a covered walkway between the cathedral and the Catholic elementary school adjacent to the high school. As we walked along, Patti looks down and says, "Look a shark's tooth?!?" She was excited, yet puzzled. Because of the early morning hour and minimal light coming in through the short passage, I could not see it clearly. So, we were both curious as to why a shark's tooth would be lying here miles upon miles away from any saltwater. But, it quickly dawned on us, it probably fell off of a necklace. Obviously, everyone wears a shark's tooth necklace. The it souvenir number one when you go to the beach (forget sand dollars and iron-on decal fringed t-shirts).

So with out further delay, Patti attempted to pick it up. Well, it turns out it was a slug. She screamed, I laughed, and we both ran into school. I know no one else is bowled over laughing at this story right now, but it does bring HUGE smiles to our faces.

By the way, we both have shark tooth necklaces (well at least had, not sure where mine ended up).

The Boy Who Cried Wolf

I am apparently a terrible wife. My husband has jokingly been telling friends and family that I tired to kill him. Well, maybe my inaction could have killed him, but it was not intentional.

Last Friday, my husband was apparently going into anaphylactic shock. Fortunately due to unrelated sinus issues, he had taken Benadryl prior to the onset of the severe allergic reaction causing it to slow the process. I am a bad wife because when Donnie first mentioned that he may be in anaphylactic shock, I shrugged him off. “You would know if you were going into anaphylactic shock,” I sniped considering that he had once been rushed to the ER because of it. He him-hawed for at least 30 minutes about whether or not he should go to the emergency room or if he in fact was having a severe allergic reaction. “If we go to the hospital and you just have a sinus pressure, I am never letting you live this down,” I sniped again.

Well, he was suffering from a severe allergic reaction and was given more Benadryl and steroids at the ER in order to combat it. According to the physician’s assistant on call (no one sees a real doctor anymore), the at-home Benadryl really helped calm the situation. Rather than closing off his windpipe all together, his throat was only a little swollen and his face slightly puffy. Two hours later, he was able to leave breathing clearly.

I know anyone not knowing my husband well would think I am an all out bitch for not taking his medical concerns seriously. However those who do know my husband well know he overreacts to everything. I have been scared many times thinking he was having a heart attack only for him to state (long after he writhed in pain for a while) that he had a leg cramp. Not only does he over dramatize the pain (which he seems to have a low threshold for anyway), he also does not respond to multiple requests of “What’s wrong?”. No, he just hopes around groaning in pain and not responding or being vague about what is happening. I don’t want to call 911 because he stepped on a tack.

My favorite is when he “gets” whatever you just had. I once complained about horrible cramps (which were caused by menstruation) for him to come to me a day later with the same symptoms and indicating he caught what I had. And, I am not the only one to witness this behavior. It is an on running joke with his best friend. Good thing Donnie is a good sport about this.

So when he started with his “I can’t breathe, I think I am going into anaphylactic shock” Friday night, it was hard for me to accept that it was not trumped up. I know Donnie is the sickly kid and is very susceptible to colds and such (which I do feel bad for him), but I am sometimes cynical about his condition (plus I am just cynical in general) due to the drama. Because he cries wolf, I know I will not take him seriously when it matters (i.e. Friday night). I had joked with a friend recently that his epitaph will note how he died because no one took his illness seriously.

I would like to think that after Friday’s shocker, I would listen more closely the next time he has an ailment. But I probably won’t. I most likely will dismiss him choking for burning his tongue. Like I said I am a terrible wife.

Yankee Doodle, Not Dandy for Normal Folks

I want to be rich and famous. Hell, just give me the famous! It is not fair to the rest of the world needs reservations two years in advance to get into trendy restaurants and pay for their own meals. It is also not fair that regular folks not only have to pay full price, worse yet scalper rates, for tickets to hot sporting events if they are even lucky enough to get them.

Though a HUGE sports fan, the difference in lifestyles between athletes and the rest of us is just an injustice. However, it only gets worse when it comes to stage and screen (or no go reason other than I’m rich) celebrities. As a slap on the face to every die hard New York Yankees fan, Billy Crystal will get the opportunity to play in an exhibition game the day before his 60th birthday. Now, Crystal is an avid baseball fan and has grown up loving the Yanks. But be honest, if he was just a regular schmuck, this would not be happening.

The ultimate fan fantasy is coming true all because of Crystal’s celebrity status. Regular folks would have to pay thousands of dollars to wear the pinstripes at a fantasy camp and have the benefit of some farm leaguers showing them how to bunt and throw rather than an active player. And though preseason is a chance for the young kids to shine, Crystal will get to train with the entire team. And no doubt, he will get a high-five from Jeter if Crystal happens to make contact with the ball. Or maybe a good luck slap-on-the-back from A-Rod before exiting the dugout when Crystal is next on deck. He might even get to share a cycle with Giambi. (OK, that was a bit much).

Crystal isn’t the first person to get special treatment in the sporting world because of who he is. Isn’t Spike a permanent fixture in the Knicks’ locker room? I am not denouncing celebrities as sports fans, but because of their social status they get treatment most of couldn’t even pay for if we won the lottery.

So, what do we regular folks get? - jacked up ticket prices and autographs at $40 a pop. In a way having Crystal sign for one game does make sense. How else do you get fans in the seats for an exhibition game, especially one against the pathetic Pittsburgh Pirates? Of course Bud Selig approves. Baseball is in a slump. Even the superstar status of A-Rod and Jeter is not enough to make Americans fall in love again with this nation’s pastime. Sure you have your diehards, but maybe gimmicks are what the sport needs. What better way to shrug off a year of steroid scandal then with a comedian in the outfield?

When Shopping Goes Bad

On Sunday, my hubby and I started the day in a good mood. We were getting things done around the house, the sun was shining, and I even prepared a store list, complete with meals for the entire week. We had such a good feeling because our plans for the day were moving along. For once, we were on the ball. All we needed to do was hit the store.

And, that is where it all fell apart. I was optimistic as we pulled into the parking lot. Store list in hand, I was prepared to get what we needed so we could get home. Tonight we would dine on a new chicken and veggie dish (cooking at our home has been rare in the past several weeks), catch up on our DVR recordings and have an enjoyable Sunday evening – one with out fretting over a wasted weekend and what we did not accomplish.

Heck, I was still content as I walked through the automatic doors and grabbed a buggy. It was when I entered the next stage of the store, leaving the alcove of the shopping cart return, that I was struck by the Wal-Mart Syndrome (WMS).

WMS is a disease that strikes when you enter the discount retailer during peak and are overcome with anxiety. My thoughtfully categorized shopping list was now written in a foreign language. My somewhat intelligent mind could not comprehend what canned goods were, let alone make a decision on dark or light red kidney beans. And to top it off, there was a sudden tension between my spouse and me that made me want to bite his head off for asking where he could find bouillon cubes.

Feeling this darkness invading my heart, I quickly divided up the lists. I could see in my husband’s eye and tell by his short tone that he too was infected. We might be able to survive if we could quickly escape this store from hell.

One-by-one, we checked items off of the list and booked it to the registers -- typically a nightmare situation, but we got lucky. There was a lane open, no wait. Boom, boom, boom we loaded the conveyer belt, paid for our groceries and snatched up our bags. Once inside the sanctuary of our truck, we started to calm a little.

I wish I could blame the hordes of aggressive shoppers on a beautiful spring day after a long hard winter, but other than the last two weeks, it has been mild. And, two weeks of some snow does not constitute cabin fever. For the most part, only a few more folks than usual were enticed by the warmer weather to vacate their homes. No, it is the iniquity that is Wal-Mart that brings out this disease. I am not sure if it is the store itself or the type of shoppers it attracts (and not necessarily the amount).

Despite all of that mental turmoil, I will continue to patron that place, hoping each time I am not eaten alive. To be honest, I would swim through the River Styx if I could save a buck.